I won't quite call this quackery, but I'm pretty dubious as to the
actual uses of this book. I even tried out some of the methods in here
and even though I knew the people I asked weren't going to lie to me,
according to this book, they were. But I'll get into that later.
Never
Be Lied To Again goes through all the different ways of lying, how to
determine if someone is lying, how to get to them to tell the truth, and
other strategies you could ever want to know. It helps determine body
language, phrases used by liars, and methods they use to cover up their
lies. It also tells you how to coax the truth out by different methods
of interrogation or giving people the "easy way" out of a lie. It says
that you can get to the truth in five minutes by using these methods.
Ok,
well here's the problem. In order to begin to memorize these
strategies and use them, it's going to take way more than five minutes.
In fact, by the time you get the hang of it, you may not even need the
skill anymore. And then there are the dubious ways that you would go
about getting the answer you want. A lot of it involves lying yourself,
which I've always heard two wrongs don't make a right. And then
there's the promising good things will happen if the person tells the
truth, without really saying if you should back it up. If you lie about
not getting mad, etc. the person is only going to believe you once, and
this method will become ineffectual after the second time. In fact,
the whole process for ferreting out a lie seems sleazy and relationship
damaging. Especially if the person you suspect is lying, is telling the
truth.
Then there's the recognizing if someone is a liar or not.
There are some well known truthful ways to determine that in here.
For example, body language and no eye contact. But then there's the
little test I ran. The book says that if someone is recalling a memory,
they look up and to the opposite side of their dominant hand. If they
are making it up, they look up and to the same side as their dominant
hand. I walked up to my mother (who did not know the book I was
reading) and asked her what the color of her first car was. She looked
up and to the left (she's left handed) and said that it was copper. And
she has the pictures to back up the fact she was telling the truth.
Ok, that was one time, I did the same thing with my brother, asking him a
memory question and he looked me straight in the eye when he answered.
So to me, even though I know this wasn't a full experiment, it was a
pretty big clue that not everything in this book is true or useful.
Another
criticism I would have is that aside from a couple sentences, the book
doesn't go into socio-paths, mental disease, and other types of people
that this book would have no bearing on. If you don't care that you're
lying, believe your lie is the truth, or are convinced that your lie is
in the best interest of everyone, nothing is this book is going to work
at ferreting out that lie. And having been in a relationship with two
liars, one of which would probably have admitted to things using a
couple of the applicable yet sleazy methods in this book and one who was
a socio-path and lied because he had no care of its effect, I can say
firsthand that it is the second person who scares me the most. Not the
first. Lies, while they hurt, are easier to deal with than someone who
can lie without impunity and not care about its effects.
To just
comment on the overall writing style of the book. It's written in a
clear precise way with bullet points outlining the helpful steps and
tips. I can't find fault with the way the book is formatted. It also
reads simplistic, and easy to understand for most anyone who would pick
this book up.
I know I sound rough on this book, but I really
didn't find it helpful at all. I would never practice the methods here
for fear of becoming a worse person (and a liar) myself. If I suspect
someone of lying and need to use the methods here, it's probably best I
don't associate with that person at all instead of going through all the
trouble this book suggests. Not a book I would recommend to anyone.
Never Be Lied To Again
Copyright 1998
205 pages
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